Saturday, December 18, 2010

Party Like it's 1985

From 15 year old Anna See:

It's almost Christmas and I still have a TON of presents to buy. Thinking perfume for the girls at school. "Beautiful" for Jamie, "Opium" for Lori and "White Shoulders" for Karen. Not sure about "Georgio." Liz wears it and it gets all up in my nose. Barfs me out.

I have Mom's new VISA with MY NAME on it so I am SET. She got if for us when she couldn't stand taking us to the mall one more time. Seriously, I thought she was gonna cry the last time we went together. Or kill us big time.

Not sure how much all of this is going to cost but, hello, I am NOT going to be the only one not giving presents on the last day of school before break. Nobody even pays attention to teachers that day, it's all about the PRESENTS. I don't think Mom and Dad look too close at the bill anyway.

This year is weird friend-wise. I mean for Valentine's I can buy all my friends (guys too!) a carnation in homeroom for a buck a piece and put a nice note on it, but for Christmas I don't want to be all like, I love you-- hug hug hug here's a gift and then make someone feel weird if they don't have one for me. There's always balloon boquets but the last time we went in together and did that for Jodi M's birthday, I don't think the office ladies liked it. A guy in a gorilla suit showed up to deliver them. Weird.

No presents for guys this year. No way. Things are looking up guy-wise since I'm a sophomore now, but who would I give one to ANYWAY? I mean a few guys ARE paying attention to me, which is good FOR A CHANGE, but it's not like I have a boyfriend or anything. I pretty much know I will NEVER, EVER learn how to kiss. I mean at this point it's too late. I should be totally broken in with the kissing thing. But if I try it NOW, it will be totally obvious that I've never done it before, so that really rots.

Too bad I never got invited to a boy/girl party in junior high. Then I wouldn't even have this problem. I know they did spin the bottle AND 7 minutes in Heaven. I kid you not. Of course, that would have totally freaked me out. I mean, what if I ran off crying? I cry about everything and I wish I DIDN'T! That would have been just as bad as when I threw up on Mrs. Compton's desk in the middle of French class in 7th grade. What a popularity-disaster!

Totally know I'm gonna turn out to be a nun, even though I'm not a Catholic. There are a couple Seniors who have been paying attention to me this year. Unbelievable, I know! I guess it's 'cause I'm not as fat this year or maybe it's because I have semi-cool older brother and sister. I don't know. I'll take what I can get. One thing I know: NO KISSING EVER.

I did figure out a great way to flirt a little with these guys. Just walk down Senior Hall like you're going somewhere important. Do this on a day when you are wearing EITHER: long straight black skirt, white blouse, black pumps and long fake pearls OR: Britches Rugby shirt, tight jeans (zip ankle or pegged) and Reebocks. Sweater vest okay, too.

Do NOT make eye contact, but if one of the guys says, "Hi Anna," look surprised. Open eyes wide like you suddenly remember something and say, "Oh my gosh, (put name here) you were in my DREAM last night! Isn't that so weird??!" Give no details and keep walking. Maybe smile ONCE over your shoulder. Not sure why this works, but I'm having good luck with it. This is almost as good as asking a guy to teach you how to drive stick shift on his parents' car.

Okay, so I have NOOO idea of what to get Lisa. I mean she is my BEST, BEST, BEST friend and she has those super long nails and does that thing where they are white underneath the tip and clear-ish on top. I mean, really, what does she want/need? Yikes! I hope she gives me a good hint!

NO ONE gets teachers presents in high school. Only brown-nosers.

I know I won't get anything on MY list anyway. It's not like my parents even care what I ask for. I feel like we are always the last family on earth to get or do anything. Can any of us SKI???? Of course not. You don't learn to ski while visiting your GRANDPARENTS for New Years and banging pots and pans with a spoon at midnight. Other families go on SKI VACATIONS and even fly on a plane to get there. Pisses me off.

Maybe, maybe we'll get a new VHS tape, but who knows? I do want to go by Erols and see if I can buy "It's a Wonderful Life" on Video. None of my friends have heard of it. I've seen it a million times on TV, but I want the rest of the family to get to see it, too! I cry every time, of course.

And this year, I want to stay in town for New Year's. I hear Tommy E. (not our school!) is having a party and I WANT TO BE THERE! Last year I missed it because my mom and I got lost on the way and we had no number to call, and there was no phone booth around anyway, so I spent midnight crying on my bed in the attic thinking about how miserable my life is/was. This year has got to be different!!!!!

There's always a Youth Group party. I LOVE LOVE LOVE having youth group friends AND school friends. It is totally fine not going to the same school as the youth group friends. I mean, each Sunday night it's like a little party with catching up and awesome music and skits that crack me up! I heard that James and Steve are skipping youth group and going to 7-11 to buy sodas, or smoke, or something WORSE. Man oh man. Do I believe it?

One thing I DO believe but am seriously SHOCKED about is what happened in gym class last week. We had a sub and didn't even have to dress out. We just sat on the bleachers in the little gym and talked. Heidi and Marie came in late with Big Gulps. They kept singing this song: "Jose Quervo you are a Friend of Mine" and laughing their heads off. I asked someone what "Jose Quervo" was and they said ALCOHOL. Do you think they had ALCOHOL in the Big Gulps? They were acting so weird the whole time. What if they become big-time druggies?

Well, I gotta go. We have a sock hop Friday night after the basketball game and I have to figure out an outfit. I could where my Forenza sweater Craig gave me for my birthday (yeah, I didn't kiss him, either!!) but the whole outfit has to be something: 1)that can get sweaty 2)that won't ride up/look stupid when we get on the floor to gator during that song "SHOUT."



Ann Imig said...

Off to "gator" (HA!)


(p.s. you look way too pretty with that hairdo.)

Anonymous said...

LOVED reading this!!!
Seriously... did you try that DREAM line?! How did it go?

A Forenza sweater was my big gift one Christmas.... although that was probably the year after you got yours. I'm still a little slow with fashion trends :)

anymommy said...

Perfect. I laughed out loud at brown-noser, haven't heard that in a loooonnnggg time.

Vodka Mom said...

Merry Christmas, my friend.

And no, I NEVER bought a present for a high school teacher. Sure, I took them for HAPPIES, but NO presents.

Nichole@40daysof said...

I don't know what to say, except thanks for the laugh and I was just thinking about my Forenza sweater the other day!

Anonymous said...

OMG, I am so glad that those days are over.


Liz said...

Was that an honest to goodness diary entry? If so, I am DYING. It's so Samantha Baker/Jake Ryan!

K A B L O O E Y said...

My goodness, you were pretty. Are, I mean. You know what I mean. I owned two Forenza sweaters. Good thing you didn't wear one to gator in, because what with teenage hormonal sweat glands, you might have got all up in my nose.

for a different kind of girl said...

Dear heaven, I loved everything about this post, from the tricks to getting a guy to notice you to the possibly spiked Big Gulps?! LOVE! This cracked me up!

Deidra said...

Thankfully, you haven't changed a bit. Except for the hair. But even that is still cute!

Merry Christmas!

Kate Coveny Hood said...

So many memories... I loved my Forenza sweaters. All purchased at the Limited in Mazza Gallerie. The peach one and the aqua one were my favorites. V-necks sometimes worn backwards for the sexier effect.

I think my first kiss was at 16. SO lame.

IrishRN07 said...

I totally remember that haircut! I thought it was the bravest, coolest thing ever, even before I asked you about how you decided to do it and you said you wanted to be lopsided, like your boobs. How was it that I am not friends with this girl?? I wanted to be just like Anna Maiden Name. So, with assurance from my mom that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery I took the plunge. Looking back at pictures of my lopsided Anna tribute hair I think I missed the mark SO badly, but at the time I thought I was almost as cool as you!