So which do you think is weirder? Kitty's Kelley's revelation that Oprah had a passionate love affair with John Tesh, or that Oprah downed 2 pecan pies in one sitting?
I'm going with Tesh since I, myself, am not unfamiliar with what can happen when one is left alone with a pie and a fork.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Sure Could Use A Little Good News Today
I have some exciting news to share with you!
I know I can be a little snarky and critical in my posts, and I tend to mention my bladder and feminine protection issues in excess. Today, however, I'd like to go in a different direction and share some of the great stories behind the $1827 in our Charity Water account! We have 56 days left to raise the rest of the $5,000 needed to build a well for a village in a developing nation.
Read the stories below and tell me if you think we'll make it:
My 11 year old nephew gave up all electronics during Lent. When Lent ended, he decided to give away something of great value to help others: his PlayStaytion 2 system and all his games. Which his Aunt Anna sold on Craig's list. And now that money is going to save lives on the other side of the world.
My neighbor, WIDOWED WITH TRIPLETS-- (yeah, you can read that twice,) donated furniture for me to sell for her on Craig's List. She loves antiques like I do, and she found herself scouring her house for treasures she no longer needed. Thanks, M!
My daughter, Molly, hosted a S'more's cookout on our street. She put out a cute wishing well for donations. Our neighbor's nanny put in $9.00-- fines collected from household members for leaving their shoes around the house. Inspired!
How cute is this sign she made? "Help!!! Pay atention to people! What if you were them?"
Jake and Molly each gave money out of their piggy banks which Tom agreed to triple.
A men's small group at our church committed to donating $20 each because ONE $20 DONATION provides one person with safe drinking water for $20 years.
There are so many other stories. Response has been inspiring from blog readers, neighbors, family, and friends. I am in awe of how people are DIGGING DEEP to make a huge difference in this world.
It's enough to make any lingering snark flee my life forever...
Except....
This weekend is the big Well-Raising Yard Sale my small group is having at my house. There is a profusion of crapola, er treasure, filling my carport (if you are local, feel free to add to it by Friday!)
Considering I hate waking up early on Saturdays, and despise the nickel and diming of yard sales, a wee bit of snark might come creeping back in. Which I'll be more than happy to share with you along with the amount of $ we make.
Friday, April 9, 2010
Friday Confessions?
Do you ever put on yoga pants because you think today, of all days, might be the one when you'll start exercising again? And then, when you have to go to the bathroom, you discover the bow you tied in the drawstring is quickly and frighteningly morphing into a knot? And your over 40 eyes will not allow you see it, let alone untie it? And as the seconds tick by you realize you no longer have bladder control?
Really? It's never happened to me.
Really? It's never happened to me.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Frankie Says Chill Out, Mama
So, the relatives’ visit is going great. I have loved catching up with my Sister in law and 5 nieces and nephews. Except for about 5 minutes this morning when I went stomping and screeching through the house looking for Margaret’s wayward shoe, I have not been my usual psycho-hostess self! I have also been enjoying a bit of Mike’s Hard Limeade in the evening.
One thing happened yesterday, and I’m kind of waiting to see what the fall-out will be. My adorable niece put on a t-shirt/night shirt that said, in 7 inch high letters, “Abortion is Selfish.” It said other stuff on the back, but the lettering was just a wee 72 pt font, so I’m not too concerned with it. I haven’t been so taken aback by a slogan since 1986 when my sister waltzed into the house wearing a “Frankie Says (curse word)” t-shirt, hoping to get a rise out of my parents.
Soooo, here’s the thing. I haven’t yet spoken to my kids about abortion. Not quite sure when I planned to do it, but I was NOT something I anticipated eagerly. There was some murmuring during last year’s election about some stuff they heard in the cafeteria, but I roundly dismissed it. I mean really, no matter which side of the issue one is on, I can’t imagine wanting to break the news to my kids about what abortion is.
But unless Jake and Molly are blind and illiterate, I am assuming the t-shirt be noticed and will spark some discussion in our house. Although it is much sooner than I’d hoped, it is something they would hear about eventually. While our relatives have chosen to discuss it with their kids much earlier, due to their involvement in anti-abortion causes, I guess I was unrealistic to think I could shelter my kids forever.
And isn’t that how it works? Our kids learn a lot of stuff “out there” from others, and we pick up the pieces, take a deep breath, and help frame it in the context of our own family and our belief system.
I mean it’s not as if we as parents sit them down and teach them curse words. We assume they will hear them on the bus, or in the neighborhood, or from Uncle Leonard, and then we’ll have a chance to talk about what they mean and what is okay or not to say in our household.
I remember when my sister let her son start saying Fart instead of Toot. Big goings-on. I found it shocking and didn’t think we’d ever get to that point in our family, but we did, and it really was time. It’s not as if I had to say, “Jake and Molly, I’d like to share with you some alternate terminology for flatulence.” Fart was in their word bank, waiting latent until time for use
Speaking of Jake and Molly, I’ve already told you of the pitiful tale of Jake essentially teaching the little neighbor boy what I consider the most despicable word ever. Ouch. I’m sure that prompted some dinner table discussion down the street.
And when they were 4 and 6, they took it upon themselves to disabuse any other minors of the notion that a man in a white beard and red suit was responsible for giving out Christmas presents. To any friends we managed to maintain from that era, I’m sorry and you’re welcome.
I’m sorry my kids stole your kids’ magic, but I hope the Grinch-y ideas they sowed made it a little less traumatic as your kids started to put 2 and 2 together. Heck, your kids could have been bitter 12 year olds like my husband was, embarrassed to have believed for so long and pissed at his parents for lying to him. And if you didn’t like it, you could have just said what my friend Bev did, “Just ignore them. Those See kids don’t know ANYTHING.”
And sex, do you really want to have to start explaining that from SCRATCH the night before Family Life Education starts? Not thanks. Wouldn’t it be better if little Jimmy down the street planted the seeds (ewwww….totally not what I meant) and you could do a leetle clarification? Or you could do what I did and sprinkle a lot of "How God Makes Babies" and "Where Do Babies Come From?" books around the house, hoping the kids would read them.
So, as I head off to bed, I don’t know where the t-shirt will lead, but I do know that it’s neither the first nor the last hard thing we’ll have to talk to these little guys about. Sigh.
And that makes me think, "Frankie Says Relax." Either that, or it's the Limeade talking.
Great News! The Well Project reached $1,500 today! I can’t wait to share with you some of the awesome stories of generosity coming out of this. Please visit our donation page for more info.
One thing happened yesterday, and I’m kind of waiting to see what the fall-out will be. My adorable niece put on a t-shirt/night shirt that said, in 7 inch high letters, “Abortion is Selfish.” It said other stuff on the back, but the lettering was just a wee 72 pt font, so I’m not too concerned with it. I haven’t been so taken aback by a slogan since 1986 when my sister waltzed into the house wearing a “Frankie Says (curse word)” t-shirt, hoping to get a rise out of my parents.
Soooo, here’s the thing. I haven’t yet spoken to my kids about abortion. Not quite sure when I planned to do it, but I was NOT something I anticipated eagerly. There was some murmuring during last year’s election about some stuff they heard in the cafeteria, but I roundly dismissed it. I mean really, no matter which side of the issue one is on, I can’t imagine wanting to break the news to my kids about what abortion is.
But unless Jake and Molly are blind and illiterate, I am assuming the t-shirt be noticed and will spark some discussion in our house. Although it is much sooner than I’d hoped, it is something they would hear about eventually. While our relatives have chosen to discuss it with their kids much earlier, due to their involvement in anti-abortion causes, I guess I was unrealistic to think I could shelter my kids forever.
And isn’t that how it works? Our kids learn a lot of stuff “out there” from others, and we pick up the pieces, take a deep breath, and help frame it in the context of our own family and our belief system.
I mean it’s not as if we as parents sit them down and teach them curse words. We assume they will hear them on the bus, or in the neighborhood, or from Uncle Leonard, and then we’ll have a chance to talk about what they mean and what is okay or not to say in our household.
I remember when my sister let her son start saying Fart instead of Toot. Big goings-on. I found it shocking and didn’t think we’d ever get to that point in our family, but we did, and it really was time. It’s not as if I had to say, “Jake and Molly, I’d like to share with you some alternate terminology for flatulence.” Fart was in their word bank, waiting latent until time for use
Speaking of Jake and Molly, I’ve already told you of the pitiful tale of Jake essentially teaching the little neighbor boy what I consider the most despicable word ever. Ouch. I’m sure that prompted some dinner table discussion down the street.
And when they were 4 and 6, they took it upon themselves to disabuse any other minors of the notion that a man in a white beard and red suit was responsible for giving out Christmas presents. To any friends we managed to maintain from that era, I’m sorry and you’re welcome.
I’m sorry my kids stole your kids’ magic, but I hope the Grinch-y ideas they sowed made it a little less traumatic as your kids started to put 2 and 2 together. Heck, your kids could have been bitter 12 year olds like my husband was, embarrassed to have believed for so long and pissed at his parents for lying to him. And if you didn’t like it, you could have just said what my friend Bev did, “Just ignore them. Those See kids don’t know ANYTHING.”
And sex, do you really want to have to start explaining that from SCRATCH the night before Family Life Education starts? Not thanks. Wouldn’t it be better if little Jimmy down the street planted the seeds (ewwww….totally not what I meant) and you could do a leetle clarification? Or you could do what I did and sprinkle a lot of "How God Makes Babies" and "Where Do Babies Come From?" books around the house, hoping the kids would read them.
So, as I head off to bed, I don’t know where the t-shirt will lead, but I do know that it’s neither the first nor the last hard thing we’ll have to talk to these little guys about. Sigh.
And that makes me think, "Frankie Says Relax." Either that, or it's the Limeade talking.
Great News! The Well Project reached $1,500 today! I can’t wait to share with you some of the awesome stories of generosity coming out of this. Please visit our donation page for more info.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Sunday, April 4, 2010
"I'm Doing it Because I Want to and NOT Because You Told Me To"
So we just got back from a fantastic trip to my sister's house. And by fantastic I mean that no one got hurt on the trampoline, everyone bonded and slept well, and I wasn't too much of a brat. Feel free to substitute another b word of your choice if brat is not to your liking.
As has been my lifetime practice of being nicer to complete strangers than my own flesh and blood, especially when I feel "safe" with them, I continue to be a bit of a nightmare when unleashed upon my family. For those of you who have pitied me for the way my daughter Molly unloads on me, I must emphasize here that it is payback to the nth degree.
Anyway, my sister and I had a great time, greatly aided by the fact that she is a yoga instructor, and attending her Holy Yoga (Christian yoga) class kept me calm and grounded for the most part. I got snipe-y a few times about the kids but kept my stuff together pretty well until right before we left.
After Easter services we went to Shoney's buffet. I was seriously put out when my brother-in-law announced to the waitress-- with great flourish-- "We'll all have the buffet," and the waitress disappeared, taking any chance I had of perusing a menu with her.
I realize you, like my relations, may enjoy buffets. I, however, had something else in mind. A crispy asian chicken salad, perhaps? A chicken caesar wrap? I don't even know what Shoney's offers, but I just wanted the chance to choose for myself. When I go to a restaurant buffet I tend to overeat stuff I don't really like in the first place.
So I guess you can lead Anna to the buffet, but you can't make her eat. I got screechy and weird in front of my bro-in-law as I picked dramatically at my salad and biscuit. Sure I went back later for grits and french toast sticks, but that's beside the point.
I think my tantrum was my way of saying I was ready to be back on my turf, with my own schedule, making my own choices. Old lady much?
So, L, if you are reading this, thanks for having us. The kids and I are still talking about how much fun we had. Thanks for your hospitality and for loving me DESPITE me. I miss you already.
And as far as getting the chance to practice being nicer to those I love? Tom's sister, brother-in-law, and 5 kids will roll into town on Wednesday. You read that correctly.
Pray for us all.
We are over $1300 for the Well Project, but we only have 2 months left to reach $5,000. Here's the donation page.
As has been my lifetime practice of being nicer to complete strangers than my own flesh and blood, especially when I feel "safe" with them, I continue to be a bit of a nightmare when unleashed upon my family. For those of you who have pitied me for the way my daughter Molly unloads on me, I must emphasize here that it is payback to the nth degree.
Anyway, my sister and I had a great time, greatly aided by the fact that she is a yoga instructor, and attending her Holy Yoga (Christian yoga) class kept me calm and grounded for the most part. I got snipe-y a few times about the kids but kept my stuff together pretty well until right before we left.
After Easter services we went to Shoney's buffet. I was seriously put out when my brother-in-law announced to the waitress-- with great flourish-- "We'll all have the buffet," and the waitress disappeared, taking any chance I had of perusing a menu with her.
I realize you, like my relations, may enjoy buffets. I, however, had something else in mind. A crispy asian chicken salad, perhaps? A chicken caesar wrap? I don't even know what Shoney's offers, but I just wanted the chance to choose for myself. When I go to a restaurant buffet I tend to overeat stuff I don't really like in the first place.
So I guess you can lead Anna to the buffet, but you can't make her eat. I got screechy and weird in front of my bro-in-law as I picked dramatically at my salad and biscuit. Sure I went back later for grits and french toast sticks, but that's beside the point.
I think my tantrum was my way of saying I was ready to be back on my turf, with my own schedule, making my own choices. Old lady much?
So, L, if you are reading this, thanks for having us. The kids and I are still talking about how much fun we had. Thanks for your hospitality and for loving me DESPITE me. I miss you already.
And as far as getting the chance to practice being nicer to those I love? Tom's sister, brother-in-law, and 5 kids will roll into town on Wednesday. You read that correctly.
Pray for us all.
We are over $1300 for the Well Project, but we only have 2 months left to reach $5,000. Here's the donation page.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
WELL On Our Way
Just pulled into my sister's house after a long but easy drive. She says I need to put the water project info at the end of every blog post so it's easy to find.
As she is my much OLDER (by 18 months) sister, I will obey, even though I have nothing to post about today. Unless you want to read about my family's fascination with Taco Bell, that I've started using a coverup stick to try to cover my roots, or how I wiped out-- banana peel style-- in my kitchen last night. I think I'll spare you.
Good news-- a trip to see relatives with just the kids and me-- will probably provide some good blog fodder.
Soooooooo....let me just say thank you so much for your support! We are WELL on our way to building this WELL. I know that sounds like a lame joke, but at least I didn't try to pull something for April Fool's Day.
Here's the donation page.
As she is my much OLDER (by 18 months) sister, I will obey, even though I have nothing to post about today. Unless you want to read about my family's fascination with Taco Bell, that I've started using a coverup stick to try to cover my roots, or how I wiped out-- banana peel style-- in my kitchen last night. I think I'll spare you.
Good news-- a trip to see relatives with just the kids and me-- will probably provide some good blog fodder.
Soooooooo....let me just say thank you so much for your support! We are WELL on our way to building this WELL. I know that sounds like a lame joke, but at least I didn't try to pull something for April Fool's Day.
Here's the donation page.
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