Ok?
Good.
So, our family's big news is that I have unexpectedly found myself EXPECTING A BABY!
I'll just wait and let that sink in a bit. If you need to process a while and come back later, that's cool.
***
Since we can't all sit down over a mug of decaffeinated tea, I've tried to anticipate some of the questions you might be having so I can share the whole scoop with you.
OMG! OMG! Anna, is this really true?
Yep. I wasn't so sure myself, but I have the sonogram to prove it.
How far along are you?
13 weeks.
Unexpectedly? Don't you and Tim know where babies come from by this point?
Well, yeah. We decided to stop using protection when Jack died on the off chance I could get pregnant at age 41 or 42. When nothing happened, we figured that was it. Nada. Over. Four years later, we got quite a surprise. Our chances of conceiving were less than 1%, and that's if we were trying. We were not trying.
Didn't we all just wish you a happy 46th birthday last week? Won't that make you 64 or 65 when this baby graduates from high school?
Eep.
So, how did you discover you were pregnant?
My breasts started hurting and my period was late. Doctor Google told me it was likely peri-menopause. After a couple of weeks, I went to the dollar store and bought two pregnancy tests. Those lines showed up within seconds, and I just started to laugh! BTW, if you are 46 you will need READING GLASSES to read the instructions on a pregnancy test.
What did Tim and Margaret say?
Tim was like, "Oh really? Cool!" which made me think that he would have been just fine had we jumped on the third baby wagon a decade or so ago. Margaret was concerned when she noticed I'd been to the doctor twice in a row. She was afraid I had cancer, so I was pleased to tell her that I had something growing inside me, but it wasn't what she thought. She is thrilled!
Is this a miracle? It seems like a miracle!
Kind of feels like that to me, too, as long as miracles can be joyous and scary and tiring at the same time. Tim might claim it is also a result of immaculate conception due to a dearth of bedroom activity. Believe what you wish. I also know that many people would like positive pregnancy news in their own lives, and I want to acknowledge what they are going through, even as I share my news with you.
Does this mean you are replacing Jack, everything in your life is going to be perfect, and you are going to stop mourning your boy?
Aww, c'mon. I know none of you would ask me that.
But aren't you one of those moms who enjoys her kids most when they are well past the baby and toddler years?
Definitely. I really dig 9 year olds. That's why I'm going to need some support. Baby whisperers/cuddlers welcome!
What about the baby pool? Target tantrums? Car seats? The uh-oh game? Nasal aspirators? Tiny nail clippers? The croup? Do you mean you are really going to do all of that again?
Gulp.
Are you aware that BEFORE you got pregnant this time you weighed what you weighed when you were SIX MONTHS pregnant with Margaret and that it's a lot harder to get your body back at 46 than it was when you are 29 or 31?
Thanks for the reminder.
Don't you think it's a little weird that your own mom DIED at age 46, but you are bringing new life into the world at age 46?
Completely weird, symbolic, and interesting. I keep smiling and asking myself, "What is our creative, loving God up to with this?"
So, will you be able to know if the baby will be healthy? What about you? Aren't there lots of extra risks for both you and the baby because of your age?
There are lots of possibilities. Here is some excellent info about that.
How are you feeling?
After 12 weeks of nausea, I'm feeling much better! I am super hungry and feel best while in the act of eating, so I eat a lot. I am not sleeping well because of my damaged shoulders, but otherwise am doing well. I feel a great sense of peace and am hoping to continue what has been a season of radical trust for me.
Are you going to keep writing? Public speaking? Hanging out on Facebook?
Absolutely! When I became a mom almost 17 yrs ago, I would have LOVED the community found on the internet and through sharing our messy stories. Speaking to groups is my passion, and I hope to do more of it than ever. I also am guessing this adventure will provide a whole lot of blog fodder.
Cool. Does that mean we can vote on baby names, like we did for the title of your book?
Ha! Ha! I'm not sure about that. But when we find out the gender, I'll be sure to let you know so you can start making lists.
Okay, Anna, one last question:
Does this mean Halle Berry was TELLING THE TRUTH that she just somehow got pregnant at 46?
I guess so! Do you think she'd ever come over for a playdate?
It takes a village friends, and I could not be more grateful for mine here at An Inch of Gray. THANK YOU for being on this journey with me and thanks in advance for your prayers!
