Monday, August 31, 2009

Don't Kiss Me Kate (Winslet)

So Tom and I were watching “The Reader” last night, starring Kate Winslet. The kids were at a sleepover, so we had a rare night to ourselves. I had read the book, so I knew what to expect plot-wise, but I was still a bit taken aback by all of the nudity. I mean, it’s a period piece, but I think they must have saved a bundle on costumes, because for the first hour, the two main characters were pretty much nude…frontal, backal, the works.

This was the closest Tom and I’ve ever come to one of “those kinds” of movies, and I wonder what my neighbors thought of the images of Kate and her teenage lover getting it on through our window on our new widescreen TV. Note: This is NOT a movie you want to watch with your friends, your neighbors, your in-laws, your brother, or even a bunch of strangers in a movie theater. I liked the movie a lot, but I’m not even sure if I was old enough to watch the steamy scenes.

Anyhoo, I don’t know if I’ve told you but Tom CANNOT stay awake during a movie. Ever. Comedy, tragedy, action—he’s snoozing within the hour. We usually stick to 30-minute sitcoms we have recorded on DVR, such as “The Office,” “Seinfeld,” and “Everybody Loves Raymond” so we can watch together.

After the first hour of skin, "The Reader" takes a dramatic twist and delves into terrible secrets related to the Holocaust. Tom was asleep and missed all it, yet I was riveted. I have studied the Holocaust extensively, and my mind was still churning as we went to bed. And if you are anything like me, you know the whirring torment of an overactive female brain at bedtime. I’ll take my overactive bladder any day.

Tom, newly refreshed from his during-movie nap was feeling a little friendly. After all, he’d just watched nooky on the screen (in HD no less), he’d missed the whole Holocaust part, and we had an empty house. Unfortunately, this did not mesh with my contemplation of the dark issues brought up in the movie.

I tried. I did. I tried.

He was all “An-na…” but I was all “Anne Frank.”

Some nights don’t turn out as planned.



p.s. I lost a reader today. Tom thinks it's probably because he/she thought I was too mean to Tom. What do you think?

19 comments:

Kate Coveny Hood said...

I lose readers every other day and then I gain them every other day. It evens out. It's not you (or Tom) - it's them. I think Kate W. likes being naked. It's almost a film theme for her. I sort of like that about her though since she is the first to say that she has cellulite. Letting the world see your cellulite is kind of bad ass - as least in my book. (Oh - and that really was no pun intended - only noticed it when I finished typing the sentence. I'll let it stand)

JC said...

I saw 'it' a while ago ... at home. She was good in it but I'm not sure I liked it.

( I lose followers too .. same thing ... gain two & lose one )

Christen said...

"He was all 'an-na' and I was all 'anne frank'"- too funny!!

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

Thanks for the warning about 'The Reader.' Just out of curiosity...is there male nudity as well? Speaking as a Mom, ahem, I want to make sure that we, um, avoid films with too much nudity. Unless hot guys are involved.

purejoy said...

reader?? what's a reader?? (haha. i think i have one)

saw the reader. yes on the nudity. frontal. backal (hahahaha) and more than enough information, thank you. loved the story, but could have done without all the first third of the movie.

i too am captivated by wwII and the holocaust. it was a very interesting insight into that whole issue.

loved the "he's all an-na, and i'm all anne frank"
too funny.

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

That is too funny about Tom falling asleep then waking up after the Holocaust was over. I thought you were going to say, "All the steamy sex scenes made this the first movie he ever stayed awake for."

So, do you think the nudity and sex were essential to the plot of the movie, or just a ploy to sell the movie? Did you get a sense of the nudity/sex when you read the book?

Madge said...

yeah. those nights happen. had one of those last night. not the movie part, the he was all "maaadge" and i was all, "uuhhhhh, noooo."

just can't decide if i want to see that movie.

AnastasiaSpeaks said...

You are hilarious! I loved that post. My husband falls asleep too, especially if the movie has the slightest chick-flickery about it.

And about the rest...oooh la la!

Glennon said...

Hilarious. Love your style, Anna. Although now I am sort of terrified. I never considered the horror of disgruntled, abandoning readers.
I am not sure thatI am at all emotionally stable enough to be a blogger. yikes.

Deidra said...

Too funny! When I watched the movie I also wondered if they had to skimp on the costume budget. I never could figure out if Kate Winslett's character was really evil or just naive. The scene with the father and son on the train is the one that stuck with me long after the credits had finished rolling...

Stimey said...

I just stopped by to tell you that unless you're "friendly" to Tom, I'm leaving too.

Oh, I kid.

I try not to look too closely at my stats or it would probably depress me.

The Reader is on my Netflix list. Mental note: watch it alone.

Heidi said...

I just watched The Reader about a week ago. I read the book a while back so I knew what to expect to. I often don't like the movie better than the book, but I think I liked the movie more this time. I really love Kate Winslet. Even with all the nudity she has class, you know?

I haven't been around at all in the blogosphere lately, but you haven't lost me as a reader.

Oh, and loved Anna, Anne Frank. That's so funny I'm going to mention that to my husband who also watched The Reader with me and was looking for some bedroom fun after watching that movie. Sooo didn't happen.

for a different kind of girl said...

I've not seen the movie yet, but this line - He was all “An-na…” but I was all “Anne Frank.” - well, I pretty much think I'm going to steal this line and use it in random conversations because I love it!

I lose and gain the same two readers every day. Actually, I don't know if they're they same people, I just know my number fluctuates by two every day. I chalk it up to the fact that people fear my babbling and blatant disregard for the rules for using parenthesis. Also, maybe it's because I say I'm going to steal priceless lines from other people's work. Hmmm...

:)

Karly said...

How do you know when you lose a reader? Do they email you and let you know? Or...what? How the heck do you know such things?

And, SERIOUSLY, you've never watched an adult movie with your husband? Wow. You guys should do that sometime. ;)

Cookie said...

If you lose a reader that means they become the subject of your next post. It's common blog knowledge. Or so I've heard ;)
I don't get to watch many movies :)

Ashley @ AshleysBusy said...

Haha, you were all Anne Frank. I mean, it's a serious story with a serious point. I read it and really enjoyed it. The movie was...naked. yes. omg, I'm still laughing though, Anne Frank. Is it bad to laugh at tragedy?

k a b l o o e y said...

Remember when Jerry and his girlfriend made out during Schindler's List? An-na; Anne Frank ranks up there. I liked the movie because of Winslet. It was a rare movie I liked more than the book. Sideways is another one, although I liked Sideways (the novel) more than The Reader, which I really didn't find very well written. Anyhoo, you're funny ha-ha.

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