Thursday, June 5, 2008

Rebel With Very Little Cause

Drivers and others who break the rules b/c of some sense of personal entitlement have always peeved me big-time. I’ve always been a big rule follower. The last few days, however, I’ve gained a little insight into a part of me I didn’t know existed—the rebel. The obnoxious rebel. Our home improvement project gone haywire, and the fact that in ONE SHORT DAY the kids will be home for the summer and I’ve accomplished nothing I set out to do this year, have left me feeling out of sorts and taking it out on the rules and structure that so delicately hold our society together.

My offenses of yesterday may or may not seem big to you, but here they are. At Wal-mart I went through the 10 items or fewer line with 13 items. I was fully aware I had 13 items, but I did it anyway. The other lines weren’t even long. I was just feeling feisty. Later, when I took Shadow for a walk, I left her poop in some underbrush next to the walking path. Yes, I had my plastic bag with me, but looking around and seeing no one, I kept on walking.

Later, at my kid’s class party, I greeted him and promptly started talking in the back of the room with other moms instead of helping serve the children their Roman feast. I didn’t lift a finger. What’s up with that? What’s up with me? In 15 minutes I’m supposed to report to my final lunch duty of the school year and guess what? I just don’t feel like going.

While I don’t see my household descending into a Lord of the Flies-like existence anytime soon, I must say, my moral compass is a bit off. Maybe it’s because the asbestos guys are back for a second day. Perhaps it’s our lack of a bathroom sink, or the piles of end of the school year papers littering the kitchen counters. Maybe it’s being hit up for yet another coach’s gift. I don’t know.

When my son didn’t want to pick up balls on the court at tennis lessons last night, I was steamed. He’s big into fairness, and making the others do all the work as he sat on his rear was definitely not fair. I’m left wondering if he has caught the same ornery bug as his old mom.

Anything making you cranky today?

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1 comment:

Kristen said...

It's not you, it's the HEAT! We're all a mess too. Hang in will pass! (At least I think it will...let me check the weather...)