Thursday, January 29, 2015

God Wink

I had the honor of speaking at First Presbyterian Church of Richmond, VA on Tuesday night. The topic was "Embracing the Mystery of God during Hard Times." I don't always speak about God at events. I also share my thoughts on writing, issues women face, and of course, grief. Usually it's a little bit of everything. I was a tad nervous about sharing so openly about faith because I figured there were a lot of grieving people there, and I don't ever want to come across as trying to push my beliefs on someone else, especially someone who is hurting. So, I just decided to do what seems to work best-- be myself-- and hope for the best.

I appreciated the warm hospitality, the thoughtful questions, and the stories that people shared with me during the book signing portion of the evening. As I had guessed, there were many people in that room, are there are in this blog space, who are dealing with great challenges with tenacity and grace.

Yesterday, I was home on my computer watching the video from the night before to make sure I hadn't said anything too annoying or off-putting. Tell me I'm not the only one who goes home from a party, event, or casual interaction and second guesses every darn word!

At 21 minutes into the video, I said this regarding Jack's death: "I wasn't sure whether I could survive the loss of Jack." I hoped those words conveyed just how ludicrous and impossible and painful it seemed to me at the beginning that I'd have to go on living without him.

The moment I said it, my computer, which had sat dormant for too long as I watched, switched to screen saver mode. During this mode, random images scroll across my screen. They could be family pictures, clip art, quotes I like, or pictures of boy bands Margaret has downloaded.

This is what came up when I said "I wasn't sure I could survive the loss of Jack"

Way Cool.

35 comments:

Rachel said...

That gave me chills.....good ones!

Paula said...

Goosebumps!

ashley said...

This gave me chills. Thanks for sharing, Anna.

~Ashley in Austin

Anonymous said...

That is amazing! I know that has to give you the most wonderful feeling.

Also, It was so refreshing that you replay in your head things you said at a party, etc. I do the same exact thing! Thanks for making me feel like I'm not alone. When I start to obsess about something I just think to myself that no one cares that much so just get over yourself.

Karen from Memphis

P.S. Love your new stitch fix clothes. Just saw them on facebook.

Julia said...

I love God winks and this was a great one. Jack was probably involved.

Hug, Julia

Cindy said...

Wow. I'd call this a "God Hug!" How comforting.

Cindy said...

Wow. I'd call this a "God Hug." How comforting.

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Yes that is way cool!

Amanda said...

Absolutely. I understand both in what you're saying about living on without your son and trying to convey at the same time the faith that pulled you through. Often times, people will tell me how I made it through and how strong I am and I'm quick to say, it wasn't my strength but the promise of my God to tuck Daniel safely away and hold me in his hands. Some bristle, some contemplate and some truly know what I mean. At the end of the day, we are both true to our journey and our faith. And that's the most important part

Anonymous said...

Wow, very cool. Mind you the glory will have to be something else! Amanda x

Martha Diener said...

As the song goes WE CAN ONLY IMAGINE

Pam@OurAdventuresInHomeImprovement said...

Wow! I love it!

Jenn Marshall said...

Love the way God and Jack send messages of comfort at the perfect moments. xoxo

Jill said...

Whoa! And much better than a boy band pic for the situation!

Jessica Watson said...

Chills. Much love to you Anna.

Jen said...

Way cool. Thanks for sharing. I needed to hear this. God is good. I love when this happens. Blessings Anna.

Laurel Hawkes said...

What a joy when God reminds you He truly is listening.

ella said...

Yep, good chills here too. I love these God Winks, thanks for sharing.

Kathy at kissing the frog said...

Umm, I love this, and I love you. Thank you for the little bit of faith that I need. xo

One crazed mommy said...

Wow!

Ron Culberson said...

Love this for two reasons. First, and most obvious, we must pay attention to all the "signs" around us. So many beautiful messages. And second, you worried about how the audience would perceive your message. So classic! We second guess. And of course, the more honest and real you were, the more connected you became to the audience.

Joyce said...

Goosebumps! xo

mandy said...

Way way cool xx

Molly said...

I read this last night and got chills. Seriously. I feel certain Jack is very much still communicating with you. Just not in the normal way that we do here on earth.

AndreaW831 said...


I don't believe in coincidence. :) Amazing.

I do the same thing after I have just conversations with people!

Beth Marshall said...

Love this so much... wow. Thank you, Anna.

Meredith W. said...

Wow!

Jamie Reese said...

I SO hold on to this truth with both hands! Glad you got a wink

myinnerchick.com said...

With GOD...All things are possible.

Anna, I am reading Rare Bird & I am blessed by your words.

xx thank you.

Lady Jennie said...

I'm wiping a tear. I'll take all the God winks I can get - even vicarious ones!

Florida mom said...

So reassuring, thank you for your blogs. Always helpful in dealing with life after the death of a child.

Esther said...

I stinkin' love you. Thank you for helping us to see that beauty grows out of pain.

Anonymous said...

Way Way Cool!

Princess Kate said...

Love this post. I believe with all my heart in God Winks.

Sybil@PeaceitallTogether said...

That is incredible! I just love the way that God works!! I am finding these "little things" impress me more and more. Also, I can't believe you watch yourself. Yes, I rethink my every word, but I can't watch myself. You must be a pro! :)