I had Lasik last year and it didn’t go very well. My vision is at its worst when I am trying to read anything, near or far. Since the surgery, I’ve had quite a few mix-ups while scanning the morning paper. I’ll be up in arms about what I think is an outrageous headline, then I’ll discover I’ve read one word wrong, and the article is a lot tamer than I’d anticipated. “Gays Prices Go Up Again” is really “Gas Prices Go Up Again.” “Town Council Debates Feces” is actually “Town Council Debates Fences.”
This morning I came across “Buried Foot Baffles Authorities.” Grossed out that they would have the audacity to include a photo of a severed limb, I quickly covered the accompanying picture with my hand and began to read the article. After I started reading I realized it said “Buried LOOT Baffles Authorities.” Oh well. The fact that the Laser center I used for my eyes is now shuttered with a “For Lease” sign in the window does not surprise me at all.