Don't Kiss Me Kate (Winslet)

So Tom and I were watching “The Reader” last night, starring Kate Winslet. The kids were at a sleepover, so we had a rare night to ourselves. I had read the book, so I knew what to expect plot-wise, but I was still a bit taken aback by all of the nudity. I mean, it’s a period piece, but I think they must have saved a bundle on costumes, because for the first hour, the two main characters were pretty much nude…frontal, backal, the works.

This was the closest Tom and I’ve ever come to one of “those kinds” of movies, and I wonder what my neighbors thought of the images of Kate and her teenage lover getting it on through our window on our new widescreen TV. Note: This is NOT a movie you want to watch with your friends, your neighbors, your in-laws, your brother, or even a bunch of strangers in a movie theater. I liked the movie a lot, but I’m not even sure if I was old enough to watch the steamy scenes.

Anyhoo, I don’t know if I’ve told you but Tom CANNOT stay awake during a movie. Ever. Comedy, tragedy, action—he’s snoozing within the hour. We usually stick to 30-minute sitcoms we have recorded on DVR, such as “The Office,” “Seinfeld,” and “Everybody Loves Raymond” so we can watch together.

After the first hour of skin, "The Reader" takes a dramatic twist and delves into terrible secrets related to the Holocaust. Tom was asleep and missed all it, yet I was riveted. I have studied the Holocaust extensively, and my mind was still churning as we went to bed. And if you are anything like me, you know the whirring torment of an overactive female brain at bedtime. I’ll take my overactive bladder any day.

Tom, newly refreshed from his during-movie nap was feeling a little friendly. After all, he’d just watched nooky on the screen (in HD no less), he’d missed the whole Holocaust part, and we had an empty house. Unfortunately, this did not mesh with my contemplation of the dark issues brought up in the movie.

I tried. I did. I tried.

He was all “An-na…” but I was all “Anne Frank.”

Some nights don’t turn out as planned.



p.s. I lost a reader today. Tom thinks it's probably because he/she thought I was too mean to Tom. What do you think?