Sunday, May 24, 2015

The Dash

On Thursday I drove down and back to Richmond to receive an award at Full Circle Grief Center's Living your Dash Luncheon. It was lovely, and every time I learn more about what Full Circle does to help hurting families, I am so grateful!

The concept for the luncheon was to recognize that we all have a birth date and a death date. And while the dash-- the years lived in between the two-- could vary from just a few hours to many years, WE choose what to make of the dash.

It reminded me so much of a special post about Jack when he played MacBeth in his 6th grade play.

Some days I am not so sure I'm using my dash wisely.

I've already lived 33 more years than Jack got to, and next year I'll age past my mother, who died at 46. I know my days are already numbered in God's book, and this invites me to consider what my dash looks like. Honestly, most days I am content to putz around the house, doing a little of this and that, speaking to no one, and thinking about what I want eat next.

But there is an ever-present, quiet tug pointing me beyond the mundane toward greater meaning.

What could that look like? I know I want to help others. I want to use my stories, not just the ones about Jack, but whatever stories I may have, to somehow touch others and intersect with their own. For now that means writing and speaking, sharing Rare Bird, being a real, flawed, flesh and bone example of survival, and learning how to be a better listener.

A listener of the sacred stories people bring to me through this blog and in person, a listener to the gentle tug of God that leads me outside my cozy, insular self and points me toward others, and a listener to the reassuring whisper of a son who says, "I may not be at your dinner table, but I'll be your partner in whatever you do."


11 comments:

  1. The tag on this post suggests you might be having a mid-life crisis. Me too. It's not very much fun. I'm not sure I'm living the dash so much as imitating the dash (as in, I've been flattened and I can't get up). ;)

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  2. Anna, like you, I am content to be at home, working away at my school work, writing, and puttering around the house. Since retirement, I have less interaction with people, so I have to remind myself that I need a healthy balance.

    I don't think I use my dash wisely all the time either. I try and stay open to God's call, and say yes, when He calls. Some days are harder than others. xo

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  3. Congratulation on your award. I've wasted years with worry and haven't learned how to enjoy the present. When I reached 60 I looked back and realized that it is time to do something with my dash yet most days it seems easier to just putz around the house too!!

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  4. Futzing around the house gives me immense pleasure these days. I lost my son two years ago and I'm doing my best. I refuse to feel pressured by a dash!

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  5. I lost my daughter 4 years ago and I feel like I should be living the dash a lot more intensely now. That's how my daughter lived her last 2 years - like it could all end in an hour.The strange thing is I like being alone at home much more now than I ever did. Don't know how this will all even out in the end but I love challenges.
    Congratulations on the award.

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  6. Anna, once again you challenge me, even when you do not mean to. At age 60 my husband talks like we are done as far as adventures or impacting others. I am also 60 but i do not feel done at all, no where near. But I don't feel pressured as much as I did when I was younger, it's like anything important I do now will be frosting! :)

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  7. I'm not overly concerned about my dash right now (but I'm older than 45!). I've worked full time all while raising multiple children, volunteered as my time permits, been a good friend. We all do what our energy level allows!

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  8. Of course, you have no idea how much this resonates with me, but...it does. Immensely.
    Thank you.

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  9. Congratulations on the recognition, Anna. I have to say that your dash has endured more than most people's ought to ever, already, and look at how graciously you have handled it all. I too think you're entitled to enjoy your quiet, putzy days, but I definitely understand the call to something more...significant, however that unfolds. I trust that it will come.

    love,
    jbhat

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  10. Anna, I think you're wonderful. Truly.

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